des moines, iowa and beyond

workflow & systems strategist

Sweet Beginnings: Communication

For Brides

Today is not about earth-shattering advice or novel ideas. Today’s post is all about the best thing you can do for your wedding and your future. That, Lovelies, is working on your communication skills and remembering to do so throughout your entire planning process.

In life and wedding planning, the most important thing to remember is that we need to be good communicators. Unfortunately, no one is a mind reader and the adage about assuming rings true more often than we would like. Without explicit communication and sharing our ideas, reality is bound to fall short of expectations, no matter how hard we try.


If you ask anyone, they will tell you I am a talker. In my opinion, it is always best to over communicate something and make sure that nothing is overlooked. When it comes to planning, the lines always need to be open and we need to be mindful to never assume that anyone knows or will do something. Let’s look at this from both the planner’s perspective and that of the bride and groom. The answers to all of the common questions are two-fold. Yes, but… Without talking through each point and understanding, on both sides, what the other person needs and can offer, an optimal relationship and outcome will be an uphill battle. We must educate each other.

From a couple’s perspective, you have hired a team of professionals to make your day wonderful, everything you dreamed. You are paying them good, hard earned money to do so. Don’t they know how to give you what you want and make your life easier? Yes, we do. We also want to give you what  you have dreamed of for so long. We want to know what  you envision, your concerns and offer our expertise to make things run smoothly. We need and value your input. Why should you need to go over every detail of their process or services? To offer you our knowledge and give you the best service possible. We might know or offer something that you had never thought of. You might love it!

As a planner or vendor, why don’t our clients understand why we ask them certain questions? Don’t they know that things cost this much or that a typical timeline includes xyz? Not necessarily. This is likely their first wedding. This is all new to them and it is our job to educate them and explain. On the other hand, why do they ask me so many questions? They hired me and they should trust me to do my best work for them. Again, this is all foreign territory. Even if they’ve attended or been in a wedding before, this is their day. That comes with a slew of new concerns, ideas and levels of detail they have not experienced before. 

Friends, it is all about communicating! I know, I’m harping on that word, but it is so IMPORTANT. Not just in the client/vendor relationship. You also need to remember to talk to your fiancé and families throughout the process. These are not life or death decisions you are making, but they are about your day as a couple. About the beginning to your forever. Those are things that you should both agree on and warrant many a conversation.

Regardless of who is involved in the conversation, the majority of us operate best when we get more information. The more open and honest we are with each other, the better we can serve each other. As a planner, I find it incredibly helpful when my brides and grooms ask me questions and share stories. That helps me get to know them, build a relationship and dream up ideas that will showcase who they are. To be a true team and accomplish beautiful and meaningful weddings, we must all be on the same page. That is why communication is the best thing you can do for your wedding. Be an open book and you’ll have the best opening chapter to your happily ever after.

xoxo, Jenn


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